It’s Time
“It’s time,” the voice boomed.
Tyler shielded his eyes from the blinding white light and watched the hooded figure take slow, deliberate strides towards him.
“Who…who…who are you?” Tyler asked, dragging his butt on the cold floor to get away from the presence.
“I am the end. You have led a sad, pathetic life, squandering opportunities and disappointing those that loved you.”
“Loved? What do you mean loved? What is this past tense stuff? Where am I?” Tyler looked around and saw only darkness. Beads of sweat trickled down his face and neck from the scorching hot air.
“You are at the end.”
“The end? But I thought…How did I…”
The figure stopped before Tyler’s feet. “You should have chewed your food more thoroughly. Now you will pay.”
Tyler started sobbing. “I should have done a lot of things differently. Please, oh God, please. It’s so hot. I hate the heat. Please don’t take me down there. I was a good person. Please.”
Tears mixed with sweat as Tyler kneeled before the cloaked figure and bowed his head in sorrow.
“This is too easy,” the figure said with a snorting laughter and removed the hood from its head.
“…Uncle Jimmy?” Tyler asked with wide-eyed disbelief. “What the hell, man?” Tyler leapt to his feet and shoved his long dead uncle.
“I’m sorry. I couldn’t resist. Ah, you cried! This is priceless.”
“That. Is. Not. Funny. I thought I was going to roast for eternity,” Tyler said and gave him another shove.
“They’re fixing the air conditioning. You’re fine.”
“What are you even doing here? How are you the first person I see up here?”
“I fill in as the Gate Man on holidays sometimes.”
“You really shouldn’t be allowed to have that job.”
“You’re probably right. You should have seen what I did when your sister arrived. She still won’t talk to me.”
Well! That was certainly an original take. Big grin!
Thanks for reading!
Wow, I don’t know whether to laugh or cry. Maybe a little of both is in order. Creative and original. Nice writing.
Thanks Steph
This is really very good
The idea of someone filling in as gate man on holidays is hilarious, as is the idea of them needing to fix the AC. I’d like to think that we’re not still subject to the whims of our practical-joking family members by that point, though!
You should’ve chewed your food more carefully. Ahahahaha!!!
Great reading as usual! I’ve been missing my H.L. Pauff fix.
“You really shouldn’t be allowed to have that job.”
Love that line! Can hear the inflection.
Oh, that twist! That glorious, glorious twist!
It was so eerie, and then dissolved into a brilliant laugh-riot. Thank you! I needed that!
Oh, that’s messed up! That uncle is trip
I like the humorous/creative take on this.
lmao I find it funny that he’s okay with the fact that he’s dead now that he’s in Heaven xD
lol Wonderfully funny. Chewing food as cardinal virtue!